“Happy”

You may have come across techniques to seek happiness. You might have read books, articles, and videos that talk about finding ways to be happy. If we follow their advice, word by word, we might be able to lead a serene, beautiful life with no worries. Unfortunately, we all know that life throws curveballs at us at every corner, and dodging them takes up our mind, peace, and all that zen. It will destroy the rhythm we had planned. So what do we do then? Are there any basic techniques that ensure we stay happy?

After researching on this topic, with people, through books, videos of positive thinkers, and based on what I have inferred in life, I believe that there might be a few pointers that can guide us towards achieving a happy frame of mind. Let me enlighten what I feel works with time.

• The company you keep – Unless you are the kind who can be solid as a rock without anyone in your life, company matters. Your family and friends- the ones you mostly hang out or interact with can largely influence your state of mind. If the people you surround with spread negativity all the time, or, if they try to bring you down and hurt you, they are of no good. Chances are, you are frustrated and living the worst version of yourself. Always surround yourself with people who understand and support you. Ones that empathize and push you forward. The lively ones from whom you can learn a lesson or two are the best. In life, you may not be able to do away with some relations but for the ones where the choice exists, for example, a colleague or a friend, if they are not good for you, letting go is your path to happiness.

• Things you love to do – Finding your goto passion/hobby or activities that will keep you busy is essential. In today’s world we might not find a job that we’ll love. The only outlet to escape its stress is to find other things that’ll keep us engaged in our free time. And, if you have the freedom to pursue your passion, then nothing like it. The activities or hobbies you find should preferably be ones that can be done in solitude where an external dependency is omitted. It will help us handle ourselves with peace and help clear our thought process. Ultimately, paving our way to a happy mind.

• Zero comparison. Build a Shield – No two lives are the same. The path you are leading today are consequences of choices you’ve made in your life, along with some uncontrollable situations that life handed you. There is no room for comparison with another being. You don’t achieve anything positive and all you are left with is despair and dejection. Make the best of your situation and lead your life oblivious to what is happening in your circle. In the process, learn to shield yourself from unwanted opinions and suggestions that the world has to offer. There will be plenty and we need to filter out ones that lift us, not push us down. 

• Little things in life – ‘What matters are the little things in life.’ These are moments that seem insignificant but are the ones that drive the most joy. They are often unplanned and inexpensive. Watching a beautiful sunset. Sitting on a park bench soaking in the view of trees and bird sounds around. Watching your pet being goofy. Getting love for food that you cooked for others. Having a good laugh with your family or friends… and many, many, more such activities. Indulge in them. Some with others, some by yourself. Nothing luxurious. They may seem small but are impactful in boosting your happiness index. 

Life is quite uncertain that making concrete plans based on textbook knowledge of ‘finding happiness’ might be an utter flop. That doesn’t mean we can’t follow anything. Nothing wrong in trying. We can consciously practice ways that can help us be happy but always remember there will be days when nothing will work, and it’s completely ok to wait and let it pass. Happiness will be just around the corner.