“I am not so good with advice…Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” – famous words by Chandler Bing. He was honest. He knew he sucked at advice, so he refrained from meddling in others matters. Wish everyone was as smart as him.
Advice: A tempting wisdom prose which everyone believes they have tons to dispense. Friends, family, strangers, people you meet on the bus, everyone wants to shoot out their pearls of wisdom, whether the listener wants it or not. It’s free. Take it. What’s the harm, right? While it’s easy to filter out torturous advice given by people who don’t matter to you, what about the unsolicited ones by your loved ones? Now, that’s a giant pain in the a–
Our primary thinking process varies from person to person. Some make logical decisions, others make decisions based on emotions and there are some who make decisions without any of the two. What may seem right to you may seem like a large pile of garbage to another. With so many factors in play, it is obvious that advice is trickery. So, why tread on it, knowing it’s a path of broken glass? It’s because we as humans believe, others can change and we have an urge to make it happen. Good or bad, nobody cares. It’s the sheer confidence with which they ‘help you’ that is astounding. These people believe that others are holding out an invisible placard that says, “Please, I need your valuable input on how to live my life.” That’s some messed up Batvision.
While the world is loaded with ineffective preachers, there are smart samaritans too. They are wise, kind and have a butt-load of amazing advice. How do they stand out from the crowd? These are the ones that don’t meddle in others affairs unless they are approached. They understand situations including the ones that backfire, and walk in a restrained manner. They are the coolest and you are lucky if you have met them.
About the ineffective preachers- they belong to the opposite spectrum (are nothing like the above mentioned) and are ubiquitously found. They have your confidence and they love to help those who don’t need it. They believe they ‘understand’ others and are doing them a favour by advising them. Some of them do so because they believe they are returning a favour to the ones who helped them in the past (with, you know, advice). A reciprocation of sorts (you helped me, so let me damage you). This is the backfire I was talking about. They dent relationships and often hurt their listeners to whom they preach. They assume they know more about their listener’s lives than the listener themselves. They forget something called ‘empathy.’ A word so strong yet humble. A powerful tool that forms the crux of any ‘good’ advice, which pseudo helpers lack. They are clouded by their reasoning and experiences hence lack empathy. That is why you should not go around running your mouth falsely thinking you are helping someone out. The damage incurred from poking your nose into another life is far worse than not doing anything and letting it stay. To the impractical sympathizers, your listeners are better off without your foolish talk. So, let’s make lives peaceful. Be like Chandler Bing!
